Star Wars: The Musical
by arliddian
Summary: A collection of song parodies based on Lionel Bart's musical Oliver! R
1. Force, Glorious Force

**Star Wars: The Musical**

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Summary:** A collection of song parodies based on Oliver! the musical - just imagine Vader singing! R&R 

**Characters: **All the usual Star Wars characters, primary focus on the prequel trilogy.

**Timeframe: **Spans the saga.

**Disclaimer: **Star Wars belongs to George Lucas, Oliver! belongs to Lionel Bart. Don't sue me – I own nothing

**A/N:** My first attempt at humour/parody. It all started when I was in the musical for school – I kept seeing Darth Vader singing 'Reviewing the Situation'. So I decided to write a few little ditties. Hope you enjoy! The first one is a bit dodgy, but hang in there. Reviewing the Situation is pretty good – so just wait for that one! Force Glorious Force is set in TPM, when Yoda, Mace Windu and the Council are deciding Anakin's fate.

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Force Glorious Force **

**Yoda: **Is this what we've waited for  
Is this kid something much more  
Than an ordinary Jedi?  
Everyday we wonder if  
He will somehow beat the Sith  
Is he just a normal Jedi?  
Clouded and misty, uncertain and dim  
Is your future, the path to your fate  
But if you want the Jedi to take you on  
Then let go of your anger and hatred

Force, glorious Force  
It is no mere tool  
Jedi are not coarse  
We follow the rules  
Peace over anger and  
Honour over hate  
Strength over fear – this is  
Our mandate

**Mace Windu:** Force, glorious Force  
You're anxious to use it  
Treat it with respect  
Don't ever abuse it  
I don't know if we should  
Set you on this course  
Oh, Force!  
**Yoda: **Living Force!  
**Mace Windu: **Unifying Force!  
**Both: **Glorious Force!

**Yoda:** Force, glorious Force  
Let's give it a voice  
We'll feel no remorse  
If it's the right choice  
**Mace: **What is it you dream about?  
What brings on your sigh?  
**Anakin: **Thoughts of my mother  
**Yoda: **Your fear is high!

Since Qui-Gon's sad plight  
We've decided faster  
Kenobi's now a Knight  
He'll be your new Master  
**Mace:** Yes, you are a Jedi now  
Stay on the right course  
Oh, Force!  
**Yoda: **Living Force!  
**Mace: **Unifying Force!  
**Both:** Glorious Force!


	2. I'd Do Anything

A/N: I just thought I'd point out that I'm not doing ALL the songs - it's difficult to come up with an aspect of the Star Wars story that fits with every song (or that doesn't make it exactly the same as the musical). And the songs aren't in the musical's order, just in the order that I believe it works best for the story.  
This spans the prequels, into Anakin's fall to the Dark side (so it's a bit of a fast fall). Excuse the bad rhyming, haha.

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**I'd Do Anything**

**Anakin:** I'd do anything  
For you, dear, anything  
For you mean everything to me

I know that I'd go anywhere  
For your smile, anywhere  
For your smile, everywhere I'd see

**Padmé: **Would you touch my face?  
**Anakin: **Anything  
**Padmé: **Carve me a necklace?  
**Anakin:** Anything  
**Padmé:** Fly off into space?  
**Anakin: **Anything  
**Padmé:** Finish a podrace?  
**Anakin: **And win it, too

I'd risk everything  
For one kiss, everything  
Yes, I'd do anything  
**Padmé:** Anything?  
**Anakin: **Anything for you.

I'd do anything  
For you, dear, anything  
For you mean everything to me

I know that I'd go anywhere  
For your smile, anywhere  
For your smile, everywhere I'd see

**Padmé: **Would you act a fool?  
**Anakin: **Anything  
**Padmé: **Take me to Naboo?  
**Anakin:** Anything  
**Padmé:** Ride a shaak or two?  
**Anakin: **Anything  
**Padmé:** Break the Jedi rules?  
**Anakin: **What Jedi Code?

I'd risk everything  
For one kiss, everything  
Yes, I'd do anything  
**Padmé: **Anything?  
**Anakin: **Anything for you.

**Darth Sidious: **Would you kill and maim?  
**Anakin: **Anything  
**Darth Sidious: **Let your anger reign?  
**Anakin: **Anything  
**Darth Sidious: **Cause your wife great pain?  
**Anakin: **Anything  
**Darth Sidious: **Take a different name?  
**Anakin: **I'm Vader now

I pledge life and limb  
To keep you in the swim  
Yes I'd do anything  
**Darth Sidious: **Anything?  
**Anakin: **Anything for you


	3. Who Will Die

A/N: We're into the classic trilogy! This is set when the Stormtroopers go marching around trying to kill the rebels (pretty much happens all the way through the trilogy though, eh? Oh well.) I didn't put in the street criers parts, so this is short and...well, just imagine the stormtroopers singing this and you'll get it, hehe. Review!

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**Who Will Die**

**Stormtroopers: **Who will die this wonderful morning?  
Where we fly is up to our Lord  
He's the guy who issues the orders  
And stops us all from getting bored

He sends us off to crush the rebels  
To stop them in their stride  
And while they're skilled on many levels  
They see us and they hide

Who will die according to Vader?  
His dark eyes see through any lies  
Woe betide the soldier who fails him  
So who are we to kill  
To do our Master's will  
There must be someone who will die

Where are they, the Rebel forces  
They must be defeated


	4. Reviewing The Situation

A/N: This is, personally, my favourite of all of my parodies - it took a while to write, but it spawned the other parodies.The original isa wonderful song, and I hope I've done it justice!Vader's POVtowards the end of the original trilogy.

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**Reviewing the Situation**

**Darth Vader:** A Sith's got a heart  
Hasn't he?  
Joking apart  
Hasn't he?  
And while I'll be the first to admit that I wasn't a saint  
I know that I wasn't really as black as they paint…

I'm reviewing  
The situation  
I was really not a villain all my life  
I was in  
A good formation  
As a Jedi, and I even had a wife

And my wife was always good to me  
And she'd do what she could for me  
I felt betrayed, it bled in me  
When Obi-Wan she led to me  
She lied for me and cried for me  
Because of me she died for me  
I think I'd better think this out again

Jedi, all of you  
Held me back  
Obi-Wan, too  
Held me back  
But I punished you all for the rules and restrictions you placed  
And now your traditions and teachings are going to waste

I'm reviewing  
The situation  
Yes, the Jedi all are enemies to me  
Yet I find no  
Alleviation  
From the memories and guilt of all my deeds

I killed the Raiders, killed them all  
And to the Dark side I did fall  
I felt the fear when I was nine  
I couldn't save my mom in time  
Destroyed the Temple, killed my wife  
And took my former mentor's life –  
I think I'd better think this out again.

Yes, I turned away  
From that path  
Hated the way  
Of that path  
I've escaped from the limits the Jedi Code placed upon me  
The Dark side now makes me as powerful as I could be

I'm reviewing  
The situation  
I'm a Dark Lord and a Dark Lord I will stay  
You'll be seeing  
No transformation  
But it's wrong to be so evil every day

Now the Emperor has a task for me  
But it's too much to ask from me  
This awful life is not for me  
It's getting far too hot for me  
Is Dark or Light side right for me?  
And who will come and fight for me?  
Don't want my son to die for me  
What do I do? He cries for me…  
I think I'd better think this out again!


	5. Reprise

A/N: Hi everyone - I'm so glad you liked Reviewing the Situation. However, this is the last one. It takes place after Darth Vader returns to the Light side, after killing Palpatine - so when he's dying, basically. I sang it to friends of mine, and they said it was weird that sucha depressing theme was with an upbeat tune like I'd Do Anything, but I see Vader's death as kind of happy because he turns back to the Light. Tell me what you think. Hope you enjoyed these in general though - I loved writing them! Thanks for your feedback and support - reviewers are the coolest people I've never met. You can go read my other fics and review them now too!

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**Reprise**

**Reviewing the Situation**  
Can somebody change?  
It's possible  
Maybe it's strange  
But it's possible

All my deeds of the past and the Dark side – I've left them behind  
I'll turn a leaf over, and who can tell what I may find?

**I'd Do Anything**  
I'd do anything  
For you, son, anything  
For you mean everything to me

I know from evil I'd refrain  
And let the Light remain  
For you, son, good again I'd be

Let mortality come along  
This fatality is too strong  
Surely it won't be very long  
It will come to me after this song

I've risked life and limb  
To stop your suffering  
Yes, I've done everything  
Everything for you.

_Fin_


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